Whispers and Yells

“When receiving intuitive information through your body, the more you listen, the more you hear.”
– Karen Whitaker

When I moved to Denver, I was very excited about a new job I had as a Corporate HR Manager. Fast forward a year and I was not so happy anymore. I was learning an incredible amount and had met wonderful coworkers. I got along and respected my supervisor, but didn’t always mesh with her viewpoint on life, how she treated others and sometimes me. I often wondered if it was just me. Slowly, I started having health problems and had to visit many different doctors to tell me they couldn’t really find out the root of my symptoms.

Many times, my supervisor had me do the dirty work she didn’t want to do. I was sent to Chicago to meet someone at an airport hotel conference room, fire them, and return home to Denver the same day. On the flight home after a couple of too-expensive airport cocktails, the flight attendants alertly announced that there was a tornado that had touched down and we were going to land through the storm with EXTREME turbulence. They told us to put our heads in our hands, secure everything, be quiet and brace. It was a terrifying experience and I thought death might be eminent. I looked out the window at one point and swore I saw hideous winged gremlins chewing on the wings amongst the grey sky with lightening dancing around.

We landed safely, but everyone was shaking or sobbing as we departed. I couldn’t help but think to myself, what am I doing with my life? Why am I putting myself through this? I really LOATHE what I did today and it isn’t who I truly am. I finally listened to my inner voice. Change this job! Suddenly the answers of whether it would look good on my resume to change jobs or not disappeared.

Your inner Self is always trying to communicate to you. Often it is hard for us to listen. It’s important to tune in and listen to your inner voice, “gut instincts” and your physical body. First, it’s a whisper, next it’s a yell and finally it can come at you like a two by four.

Pay attention to your whispers about your job or career. First off, just observe to what is being said. Write them down and ponder. Are there repetitive themes? Question the basis of these thoughts. Are they serving you? Are they coming from a place of fear or not? For me, my thoughts were telling me that this job was not healthy and the environment was toxic. I ignored these thoughts because I wanted to be grateful for my job and positive experiences. The forced “positive” thoughts came from a place of fear of repercussions of change. If you are having trouble answering these questions, I always encourage meditating on what inner whispers you hear.

Pick up a journal if you are having a hard time hearing your whispers. Write down some questions and don’t hold back on the answers. Is my job healthy for me and my relationships? Is this job serving me? Am I truly productive in this job? What am I sacrificing at this job?

If something comes up for you that is a bit more of a yell, take a pause to listen closer. For me, my physical body was presenting problems. Others may experience problems in relationships, fender benders, missed deadlines etc. Take a step back at this experience and try to gather information. What in my life is off balance that could be trying to send me a message? When does this stress show itself at work or outside of work?

When all else fails, the universe will send a big ol’ two by four to come and whack some sense into you. For me, it was (what I felt like) almost dying and having extreme real fears riding a plane through a tornado. We’ve all had times when we wait until the two by four knocks sense into us before we make the change. It can show up as more extreme physical or health problems, break ups or divorces, official warning notices from bosses, addictions or self-sabotaging behavior, etc. The most important thing we can do at this point is to make an intentional change. Change the course because whatever you are doing in these moments, the root of the problem is not serving you OR anyone else. Sit back, reflect and see what went wrong and where you can strategically go next. When we ignore our inner intelligence and don’t make changes, it can be much more harmful than taking a fearful risk.